I am tired and frustrated, and frankly a little fed up. As I may have mentioned here previously, I am losing weight and working on creating a healthier me. This includes changing what I eat, working out five times a week, taking vitamins, and generally trying to take care of myself. I have an ultimate vision of what I am working towards, what it would look like to be a healthy me. That vision does coincide with a number on the scale, but not a number that I am married to. That number may not be a healthy best weight for me, but I won’t know until I get closer to it. Mostly though, my vision of health consists of activities and a lifestyle that I want to embrace. This transformation is not an easy one, and it is a very emotional one at times. Because of that, I do not typically discuss my weight loss/process with anyone. I do occasionally share my triumphs, which helps to keep me motivated. I know that a lot of the women around me have a very poor self image, and tend to discuss weight, etc. with great abandon. Often these discussions revolve around ways to lose weight that are not what I would consider healthy. This frustrates me to no end. I think maybe because it is because 1) I don’t want to participate in conversations about weight normally and 2) it ticks me off to no end that I am working so hard to lose weight in a healthy manner, and someone is talking to me about not eating in order to lose weight. Ugh. I am very proud of myself. I have lost 20 pounds and still counting. I walk, I lift weights, I do yoga – regularly. I take vitamins regularly. I am doing what I need to do to be healthy and fit. I am fed up with feeling like I have to hide my success, that I have to be small about it, that I have to listen to others thinking that they can lose weight by not eating and call it healthy. Why do I have to be belittled for sticking to it, for keeping up with my workouts, for wanting to be a better me? I am just fed up with it. So, I think I will take myself off to my Tuesday class and let it go. Deep breaths.
In stitching news…here is where Mystery 9 was left on Sunday evening at the end of my rotation. I’ve started on Part 6.
Here is where Lemon Meringue Sampler was left last night.
Not a ton of progress on either, but some. And someone asked about my quilt blocks that I’ve posted recently and where they come from. My blocks of the month, the batiks, are from my local quilt store, Quilt Country. I go in once a month and pick one up – the pattern and the fabrics to make it. The cat quilt is by MH Designs and is called Cat Nap (MH640), and is a paper piecing pattern I picked up at the Dallas Quilt Show a few years ago. There’s an address for the company on the pattern, if you’re interested leave me a comment with your email and I’ll get it to you.
Walk to Rivendell: Stop in a birch grove. Eat a frugal supper (Total miles: 12)
I am grateful for what I’ve accomplished.